Still hanging in there…
Easter is past, April will soon be half over, and the trees are nearly in full leaf. Where does time go?
On one hand, it seems like life is passing in a blur. On the other, the past few weeks have moved agonizingly slow.
When I wrote the last update on our little grandson Clay, I said I hoped that his surgery would be over by the following week. Two weeks later, we’re still waiting.
Not only did the little guy reherniate, but he’s been very sick with an infection. The added stress to his body seemed to bring back the pulmonary hypertension that is so dangerous to CDH babies, and the doctors said it would be too risky to operate.
Drug after drug from the early days was brought back to get him stabilized, and he’s been kept sedated and still the whole time. Only a couple of times have we seen his eyes open. We can’t hold him. This feels like reliving a very long bad dream.
These past three weeks have been harder than the first three of his life, I think. The setback was unexpected, and we had become so used to having our happy Clay who was growing and making such great progress.
There’s one thing that hasn’t been difficult to do lately, and that’s throw myself a royal pity party. It’s been a constant battle to keep the questions and fears at bay, quite honestly. I’m feeling a growing temptation to whine that life just isn’t fair.
I refuse to do that, at least in public. God knows—he’s heard all about it—but I’ll do my best to spare the rest of you. I know that we aren’t the first to experience adversity, and we won’t be the last, unfortunately.
Although the waiting and wondering have been hard, there are reasons to be thankful. Our little champ is hanging in there and making slow and steady improvements. He’s doing well enough that doctors are talking about doing his second repair surgery next week. Please keep those prayers coming.
I can only imagine how Clay’s parents are longing for the day when he’s back to his “old” self.
Despite life’s disappointments, there is much to appreciate if we just look around. We just had one of the prettiest Easters ever, and we were blessed to spend it in the company of family and friends.
I can’t say often enough how fortunate Clay is to have excellent medical care from the staff at UK Children’s Hospital. The nurses, in particular, have become friends to Hannah and Eric. They’re rooting for Clay just as hard as anyone else. Going beyond the call of duty, some have actually asked to work overtime, just so they could be there for him.
Until next time, we’ll be following the example of our strong little Clay, and we’ll be hanging in there.
Thanks again to all of you who are hanging with us. We could not do this alone.