I don’t know if I have told ya’ll about my cat and how it came to be MY cat.
About 5 years ago this kitten showed up at my friend’s house and it seemed to like it there. They would feed the kitten and sit and pet her. She loved to be petted and still does to this day.
My friend was leaving for a week’s vacation and was afraid something would happen to the kitten, so since I liked the little critter (I’ve always loved cats) I agreed to take it home with me while they were gone on vacation. Well, the rest is history. The cat has been mine ever since that day.
She was very loving, would sit in my lap and let me pet her until one day after that dreaded trip to the vet to get her “fixed” she wouldn’t sit in my lap any more. She still loves to be petted but will not sit in my lap or let me hold her.
Anyway she is quite grown up now and wants to have things her way usually. She has a chair in the living room that is “her chair.”
When she wants a little piece of turkey for a treat, she will lead me to the refrigerator. And if she wants a little “cat treat” she will lead me to the pantry. Each time she will sit in front of the door and speak a meek, please feel sorry for me—”mew.” Now “mew” is not the only word she knows, that’s just her first attempt to see if I’m paying any attention to her. If “mew” doesn’t get her what she wants, she uses other words like “meow.” If that doesn’t get any results, she tries “meow, meow” and then she goes into her southern drawl and says “meeeooow.” If that doesn’t make me pay attention she goes to her last resort, sucks it in big time, opens that big mouth like an alligator and says “wauuuugh” and in a deeper squall. Buddy I had better snap to attention with that command or it gets more intense and she just gets louder until she gets me trained the way she wants it to be.
In addition to talking the way she does, she is also very talented in many other ways, one of which no one else would probably know but me. I don’t know what kind of position she gets in when she goes to use the convenience of using her litter box, but I’m convinced she is some kind of contortionist. Now mind you, her litter box is a big plastic box with a lid on it that has the entryway open to make it easy for her to “visit” the box in private when necessary. The top to this box comes unfastened to remove the top for easy access to clean her “toilet.”
Now folks, I’m trying to paint a picture here for you without saying something that might not be proper to print. I just want you to know how talented my cat really is without getting too graphic about it. Let’s just say that lately I have noticed wet places on the floor around her litter box and when I clean the inside I have noticed that the inside walls are wet, caused by that animal getting into some kind of a position by which she wets down the inside walls of the litter box and aims through the cracks between the top and the bottom of the litter box and sprays down the floor outside. I didn’t even think she would have room in that box for such maneuvers as that would require. So, that must really take talent.
But wait!! That isn’t the only trick she knows. Now she is pulling something else on me.
I guess you all remember the song that Tiny Tim sang, “Tip Toe Through The Tulips,” well, now at my house it is tip toe through the house and watch your step.
I guess the cat thinks she would like to be a banker in her next life, so she is practicing up on making deposits. It is getting so bad that I don’t call her Kitty Kitty any more—now I call her “S @*% t y kitty.
If she doesn’t watch it, she will get to display her talents in places she has never known before, because if she doesn’t “clean up her act” she may be packing her bags and taking her show on the road.